Sunday, August 17, 2008

day 81- wiping your ass with the angels

if you are into the whole "there will be angels when i die" thing, then you might think that you will have to wait that long.

i say you don't. i say there are angels right here on earth.

they are amongst us.

they are there watching over us during own most personal moments.. guiding us... helping us to not scratch up that area that is down there. only the angels will save you from the "ass that burns".

only angels will be there to save you from some one ply copycat that will only break on you at that one wrong moment.. soiling your phalanges as they mistakenly break through.

i know its gross.. it's crass, but we have all been there. someone should publish a photography book of the looks on peoples faces as there finger breaks through with some sad one ply, only to discover what the tp already knows. this book to me would be hilarious. the reaction of people at the one moment where they know they can facially repond without anyone seeing.

just imagine the pictures. i know its a bit nasty, but think on it for a second.

and your done.

lesson in all this?

don't buy the one ply.

my brother's ex once bought the stugan out in jersey a nice present.

30 rolls of one-ply marcal ass paper.

gee thanks cokane...

i have spent the past two years in fear of fingering my own soiled sphincter.

we are down to the last roll thank god.

soon i will be wiping my ass with the angels. for a buck59 i can clean my butt the best way an american can. with some double ply cottony soft toilet paper.

i can't wait.

wrapping up
469.27 at the start
a buck59 spent
the kitty stands at 2buck16

maximum spending tomorrow


i can spend that much tomorrow

you can't stop me

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